Parents often don't understand when their children complain about boredom. After all, the world is full of opportunities and entertainment, and young people still have plenty of free time. However, it is increasingly common to see children spending hours immersed in smartphone screens, showing no genuine interest in anything. Psychologist Marina Rizvanova studies the phenomenon of childhood boredom and methods for overcoming it.
What is meant by “unproductive boredom”
Everyone gets bored from time to time. But boredom can be useful. The mechanism is as follows: a person is bored for a while, and then finds an interesting activity or hobby. He begins to devote more and more time to it, improving in the chosen area. At the same time, boredom occurs less and less often, because the deeper you delve into a topic, the more nuances, opportunities and directions for research open up, be it music, sports, reading or masterful skateboarding.
However, there are children who cannot find their passion. They take up something, but soon give up, without having time to understand the essence. They start looking for something new, but quickly become disappointed, continue to be bored or “kill time” - immerse themselves in gaming addiction, endlessly scrolling through news feeds on social networks. Such boredom is unproductive.
Which children are most likely to be bored
Some children are more prone to boredom. The “risk group” includes:
the only children in the family. Surrounded by attention from birth, they are accustomed to constant activities and entertainment from adults. Growing up, such children often do not understand how to cope with this task on their own.
children of four or five years old. Children of this age often get bored if left without emotional support. But this is an age-related phenomenon, caused by the fact that four-year-olds have not yet learned to occupy themselves.
schoolchildren from 3rd to 7th grade. In the third grade, activities considered “childish”: games, creativity - applique, drawing, modeling - begin to go out of fashion. At the same time, it is quite difficult to find a replacement for them right away. Teenagers in grades 5-7 return to creativity at a new level of development, but cannot yet accurately determine their interests and hobbies, being at a crossroads, so to speak.
children of workaholic parents. Parents who spend all their time at work or at work cannot teach their children to manage their free time because they themselves are subconsciously afraid of it and do not have stable interests in the outside world.
Causes of unproductive boredom
The child was not taught to be interested in anything
It may seem paradoxical, but interest is instilled by adults. A child who was not occupied in childhood does not know what to do to keep himself interested, and is afraid to try something new.
The opposite is also true: adults who constantly entertained the baby, giving him one impression after another in a ready-made form, caused him emotional exhaustion and satiety already at an early age. In addition, the child does not know how to independently “obtain” emotions.
Boredom is a family tradition
The child does not see in the family an example of enthusiastic adults, a desire for development. Boredom can be a daily background: adults complain about the monotony of “work-home”, turn on the TV and watch everything in a row, etc.
This way of life becomes so habitual for the child that he stops showing initiative and looking for new interests.
Fear of failure
A child, faced with real life difficulties and demands, seeks refuge in the virtual world, where everything is simpler and brighter. Fear of failure and disapproval makes him retreat from reality and immerse himself in the fascinating, but illusory world of computer games and social networks.
The desire to attract the attention of parents
Complaints of boredom can be an unconscious, veiled request for communication: “Notice me, take care of me, help me”. The child hopes that by demonstrating his melancholy and bad mood, the parents will at least briefly pay attention to him.
Desire to help parents
A child's boredom may not just be a whim, but a hidden signal that not everything is going smoothly in the family. In an effort to attract attention, a child tries to distract parents from their own problems, be it health, relationship or work issues.
How to combat childhood boredom?
Offer hobbies
A child needs a variety of experiences: reading, communication, creativity, sports, outdoor games. Club activities, master classes will help him try himself in different areas and find what will really captivate him.
Involve in household chores
In addition to helping combat boredom, this method also strengthens the bond between parent and child and promotes the development of trusting relationships.
Teach yourself to keep yourself busy
Together with your child, you can make a whole list of exciting activities, buy creative kits, or come up with a joint project.
Have heart-to-heart talks more often
By paying attention to the child's feelings and desires, we help him feel heard and understood. Discussing the situation together will help find an interesting solution and make the process of overcoming boredom exciting for both.
Take care of yourself and your life
Often children adopt their parents' enthusiasm and optimism. If adults are open to everything new and have their own interests, then the child will be more likely to show curiosity and activity. Therefore, before looking for ways to entertain a child, it is worth thinking about how to inspire him to new discoveries by your own example.
Resource: pedsovet.org
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